I am the very model of a pagan intellectual…

I wrote this on the back of a menu in a restaurant in Montreal, for the open-stage night at the Gaia Gathering, a few days ago. Enjoy!

I am the very model of a pagan intellectual
I’ve studied ancient knowledge, theoretical and practical
I wear these little glasses, and a pony-tail to tie my hair,
and also talk a lot of rot both all the time and everywhere.

I am the very model of a pagan intellectual
My workshops at the festival are always billed as magical
And yet when you attend there are no rituals or jewelry
Instead you get a load of stuff so weird it must be mystery

I’ve stayed awake in lectures that a lesser man could not endure
I’ve reconstructed ancient ways, especially the most obscure
In short, in all the matters theoretical and practical
I am the very model of a pagan intellectual!

I am the very model of a pagan intellectual
I talk of topics scientific, also philosophical
I have initiations from a modern university
And always post my essays on the internet for you to see.

I am the very model of a pagan intellectual
And yet you find me with my djembe drumming at the festival
I can raise a cone of magic power with most anyone
And then debate about the finer points until the morning sun

I can quote a thousand myths and legends from the ancient world
I wear a Goddess pendant in the hope it will impress a girl
In short, in all the matters theoretical and practical
I am the very model of a pagan intellectual!